“If you’d feel better playing gun games with a controller that’s more like a gun (as some players like to play golf games with a controller that’s ‘more like a golf club’, though we still think they’re mental) Link’s Crossbow Training is a nice little extra but, whatever you do, don’t pick up a Zapper just for the game – but with Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles, House of the Dead II & III, and Ghost Squad just around the corner, there are a few good reasons to pick it up anyway.”

A judgment on the Wii Zapper and Link’s Crossbow Training as a bundle. I quite like the Wii Zapper, stupid bit of plastic that it is, as it does just feel more like shooting a gun than using the Wii Remote on its own. Link’s Crossbow Training is a waste of a pack-in, though. I’d rather they’d just knocked $5 off the price.

Nintendo could get up off their arse and release Duck Hunt for the Virtual Console now, I think. I’m well aware it would require some pretty major new code to get it to work with the Wii Remote, but frankly, a brief glimpse of the ducks in Wii Play Shooting Range just isn’t good enough.

“It’s a strange complaint to begin a review with, but why oh why do character creators never include an option for sideburns? Mass Effect has the most fully featured face creation tool we’ve seen since the Xbox 360′s last (western) RPG of note, Oblivion, but as usual you’re stuck with a limited range of base components. As a result, if you’re like me and like to spend hours trying to create a digital representation of yourself in any game which offers you the opportunity, you’ll still end up with something that could only charitably be claimed to look anything like you through half closed eyes full of Vaseline. It’s still better than the blandly handsome “John Shepard” that the game offers as the base starting character.

The character creation tool works as a neat microcosm of my experience of Mass Effect: it doesn’t live up to its promise, yet somehow it seems worth the effort anyway.”

Mass Effect is a strange title. It’s incredibly flawed – so flawed, in fact, that there are ton of issues that I didn’t have space in this (largely critical) review for – and yet I still want to keep playing it.

If I were to speculate on what the reason for the title’s problems are, I would imagine it would be a case of being a title that was bug tested far more than it was play tested. Any (half decent) play tester should have picked up on things like the inventory system being an absolute abomination, amongst others, and the game would be a lot better for it. I wouldn’t say this was a flawed gem, but it is a sort-of nice rock, or something?

“Without a doubt, October held the most significant development in downloadable content yet, with Nintendo choosing to release titles previously un-released in North America on the Virtual Console. Although they’ve only taken small steps so far, releasing only a few titles, such moves bode well and we can keep hope alive that Nintendo will release other celebrated titles that never saw the light of day here.”

A look at Sin and Punishment, Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels, Fatal Fury, Puzzle Quest: Challenge of the Warlords, Speedball 2, and Everyday Shooter.

It’s been a month, though. You should really own Sin and Punishment by now!

“Mystery Science Theater 3000 is, arguably, the greatest document of the late 20th century. The premature end of the series in 1999 was bittersweet — while the show would never render itself irrelevant, its loss has led to a void that nothing else has been able to fill.”

I love Mystery Science Theater 3000 to bits. The only show that comes close to it as a document of the late 20th century is probably The Simpsons, but considering that show is painfully bad now I don’t hold it in as high regard as I used to.

“It’s difficult for current releases to stand out in the face of overwhelming juggernaut that is the upcoming launch of Super Mario Galaxy, and one title likely to be forgotten is Capcom’s new original adventure title Zack and Wiki: Quest for Barbaros ‘ Treasure. Despite Capcom’s pedigree for quickly grasping new systems strengths and developing games that fit them (Resident Evil 4 on Wii is just one example) the lack of brand recognition could lead to many consumers missing out on an engaging, if occasionally frustrating, point-and-click adventure game that features a rewarding mix of puzzle and problem solving.”

Poor Zack and Wiki. It’s probably one of the most entertaining games I’ve played on the Wii so far, and absolutely everyone has already forgotten all about it. Almost certainly Zack and the (stupidly adorable) Wiki are going to be relegated to Capcom’s long cast of supporting characters that only ever appear in the background of more successful games, but it shouldn’t be that way, damn it!

It’d be real nice to see a sequel that fixes the flaws and maybe has a bit more of a plot to it – but then again, I’d also love to see some more Mega Man Legends games, and that ain’t going to happen either.

“I can only guess that the reason that Rockstar Games so happily censored their own title for release is that, unlike the original Manhunt, the artistic intent behind Manhunt 2 just isn’t strong enough to justify it. If the original Manhunt attempted to be the video game equivalent of a George A. Romero film, with stomach churning violence and genuine social commentary, Manhunt 2′s aspirations are barely as high as a straight-to-video slasher film.”

I’ve mentioned Manhunt 2 on this blog before, and here’s my review of it. Now, I’ve got a lot of time for the original Manhunt – though tremendously flawed, there were some really clever ideas in it. In fact, I’d go as far as to say it’s actually got more interesting things to say about morality than Bioshock does.

I’m sure a lot of people would argue with me that my interpretation of the original Manhunt is giving too much credit to Rockstar, and whoever decided to make the sequel apparently didn’t see any of what I saw either. They’ve created an utterly horrible, indefensible piece of shit inspired by the current “torture porn” craze that, like crap like the Saw films (or whatever) doesn’t even try to say anything with its (incredibly obscured) violence.

I’m happy to defend Manhunt 2′s right to exist (even in uncensored form) but I’d be happier if it didn’t. Or rather, if there wasn’t a market for it.

“Despite its repetitive aspects, the title truly is a joy to play from beginning to end. Chibi-Robo: Park Patrol joins its predecessor by being one of its system’s best games: brilliantly realized, wonderfully playable and, now, critically acclaimed. Don’t let it be ignored by consumers.”

Straight up this is probably the sweetest game I’ve played all year. I probably don’t like it quite as much as the original, but I think that’s more to do with the limitations of the DS hardware, more than anything.

So after reading this review, there are a few things you should do:

1) Run out and buy Chibi Robo: Park Patrol. (Yes, even from a Walmart, if you absolutely have to.)

2) Recommend my review using globeandmail.com’s new “recommend this article to other readers!” feature. I’m not sure it means anything in the grand scheme of things, but it makes me feel big and important. So do it!

“Beyond Halo, there was one other story of interest this month: the US and Canadian dollar reaching parity. This was big news to some Halo 3 buyers, as it turns out that many gamers chose to shop on eBay (average Halo 3 price: $50) rather than in local stores (average Halo 3 price: $70) and I’ve noticed that by using similar tactics you can save big on points cards for the Wii and Xbox 360. If you choose to simply have the codes e-mailed to you (and save on shipping) 2000 Wii points or 1600 Microsoft points can regularly be had for less than $20. A worthwhile bargain, as it’s highly unlikely Microsoft or Nintendo are ever going to reduce prices.”

Includes a look at Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo HD, LocoRoco Cocoreccho! and Fatal Fury Special. No Virtual Console reviews in September, but considering that October’s article is going to contain almost nothing but that (Sin and Punishment, people!) I think that’s fair enough.

“What’s your favourite film of the last couple of years? Well, whatever it was, imagine you’d been waiting for what felt like forever for it to be released on DVD but then found out it was released in literally the laziest fashion possible. A barebones, non-anamorphic release with no special features, a ton of trailers before you even get to the main menu, nothing in the case other than the disc and, absurdly, burned-in subtitles that are so inexpertly done they occasionally cut the ends of words off. If you’ve managed to imagine all that, now imagine my dismay to find that this is exactly what has happened to my favourite film of the last couple of years: Joachim Trier’s masterful Reprise.”

If you live in North America you pretty much must pick this up. If you live in the UK, you may be lucky enough to see it in the cinema, as it’s currently making it’s way around the country thanks to Diffusion Pictures. It plays at the Edinburgh Filmhouse between the 12th and 14th October and then at the Glasgow Film Theatre between the 15th to 18th, so go and check it out if you, er, live in either of those places.

“There’s more to downloadable content than just the Wii, Xbox 360 and (much maligned) Playstation 3′s download services. Valve’s PC-based Steam system has already released many excellent and reasonably priced classic and original titles, including recently the brilliant turn-based strategy title X-COM: Terror From the Deep for only $4.95 US.”

Including reviews of the id Super Pack, Galaga ’90, Devil’s Crush, Super Metroid, Track & Field and Space Giraffe.

I’ve been pretty quiet about the Space Giraffe review because it’s not entirely positive and I don’t want to get put on Jeff Minter’s enemies list.

Well, not yet, anyway.