“Michael Moore’s much anticipated Sicko hits, and having seen it, we can say it’s not particularly essential for Canadian viewers to watch, unless you want to feel smug about our lovely health care system, or slightly surprised that it only takes an hour or so in London (Ontario) to be seen in an emergency room. Yes, the film is chock-a-block with anecdotal evidence, and it’s probably to the film’s fault that, as usual, Moore is selective with his anecdotes to only show free universal health care in a positively glowing light.

But Torontoist is at a disadvantage here, because we can’t even begin to imagine why free universal health care is a bad idea. Higher taxes, or something? Lame. Sicko may not be essential for Canadians to see, but it might be nice for Americans to see it. They don’t need to believe it—they can question it, as is their very right as an intelligent viewer. As long as it makes them think.”

Sicko should, by all accounts, infuriate me, but for the reasons above I can’t quite hate it – I might even think it’s alright. If it requires some really lowest common-denominator heart-string tugging to get people to think about a system that literally lets the weakest and most vulnerable die in the street, then so be it, really.

Oh, and for anyone who thinks I was too harsh on Ratatouille – I really didn’t mean to be. I’m actually eagerly anticipating seeing it (cute rats, Patton Oswalt, what’s not to like?) but come on, Pixar films are usually transparently show-offy with their latest CGI.

“It just happens to be that a few weeks ago, with an evening to kill, we picked up Peter Jackson’s King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie (snappy title, Ubisoft!) and played it through, finding it a truly interesting title (no screen clutter, dynamic difficulty settings, interesting juxtaposition between first-person moments as Jack, cinematic third-person moments as Kong, ludicrous alternative ending, etc.) that made us think we were far fonder of Peter Jackson’s take on King Kong than we were previously. But then! It was on the Movie Network that very night, and we realised that we actually weren’t—we were just fond of Adrien Brody’s character, as we’d spent so long ‘being’ him.”

I’ve actually written something that’s tangentially about my pleasure at finding that Peter Jackson’s King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie is quite good already, for Game Reactor. But I’m quite happy to state it for the readers of Torontoist, too. And you!

“Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree is a difficult sort of title for a video game reviewer to approach. Okay, sure, it has many of the trappings of a traditional video game; medals for playing well, a multiplayer mode, it comes in a box on a disc that you put into a console, that sort of thing. But as part of Nintendo’s ‘Touch Generations’ line-up, it’s probably as uncomfortable with me using the term ‘game’ to describe it as I am. The difference is, of course, is that Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree probably thinks of itself as ‘lifestyle software,’ I think of it as the digital equivalent of a dog-eared primary school maths book.”

This is a case where I really think the review says it all – as it should, I suppose. Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree is utterly pants, and particularly worth ignoring if you’ve already got the original on Nintendo DS.

“Though Lord M’Tevy wrote his hypothetical treatise ‘Music And Moving Pictures: The Concept of Giving the Combination Awards’ in 1884, it wasn’t until Sir Muchington Much begun his traveling sideshow, ‘Sir Muchington Much’s Music Video Awards and Steak Dinner Revue’ over 50 years later that people began to pay attention to the concept of ‘Music Video Awards.’ We admit he was bolstered by the dawn of synchronised audio. As children are taught in our schools, Sir Much’s traveling sideshow soon turned into a yearly gala event, the most recent of which, the Much Music Video Awards 2007, we liveblog.”

My first liveblog! I’m not entirely sure how I feel about liveblogging in general, really. On one hand, it can be a good way to get information on something that you can’t see live (Eurogamer’s liveblogs are always great during press conferences) but on the other hand, for things you can actually watch yourself (like the Oscars, other award shows) they often seem pretty pointless, a bit too “straight.”

Which is probably why I spend most of my time in this liveblog wittering on about anything that comes to mind and, usually, trying to be as funny and sarcastic about people as possible – probably the only liveblog you’re going to read with lengthy digressions on Mr. T and New Order. I think it’s worked out, and I’m absolutely astonished that I managed to write nearly 4,000 words in about 3 hours.

“We love The Patterns Trilogy. If we had more parties at our apartment, we’d have it running on our television or projected onto a wall, looping endlessly. Well, if we could be sure it wouldn’t hypnotize our guests (and ourselves) into a sublime stupefaction. Therefore, Trilogy of Trilogies, one of tonight’s Worldwide Short Film Festival programmes (playing at 7:15 p.m. at the Cumberland), which features The Patterns Trilogy along with The Saskatchewan Trilogy, is our specially designated hot ticket of the week. It’s a ticket so hot, if you put it in your trouser pocket, it would set your trousers on fire and you’d get really bad burns on your legs.”

Busy week for me at Torontoist! As well as this, I ran a Pedro Almódovar contest and edited coverage of the Worldwide Short Film Festival, plus I mentioned that I was to liveblog the MMVAs.

“Recently, Torontoist has probably been playing too many videogames. Not that that’s a problem, per se, but when you’ve become such an adrenaline junkie that you’re absent-mindedly tapping a non-existent “A” button to get past this bothersomely long “cut-scene” you’ve been watching only to remember that you’re actually watching The Omen, you have to admit that you’ve probably got a problem, and should probably cool off with some of Pedro Costa’s longest films, showing at Cinematheque Ontario this week.”

I actually like The Omen, but I have real trouble with films where the viewer knows more than the characters, and it’s probably video games fault, I think. As I watch them I’m desperate to speed the narrative till they know exactly as much as I do, specifically if they’re in danger. I don’t have the same problem with, say, Colombo, because he’s usually not in danger, and he usually knows the truth (it’s just a matter of him annoying the murderer into confessing.) In my ideal world, The Omen would have Gregory Peck calmly listening to the lunatic priest and following his instructions to the letter within about ten minutes.

I understand that’s missing the point somewhat.

Unrelatedly: What’s the deal with Pac-Man Championship Edition for Xbox 360 costing 800 points, eh? I want it bad, but it’s ludicrously over-priced. Sort it out, Namco!

“A lot of strange things have been done in the name of anthropomorphism in CGI children’s films: everything from vehicles that managed to build themselves roads and towns in Pixar’s Cars to male cows that inexplicably had udders in the risible Barnyard has been done. By those standards, a film about surfing penguins on a tropical island filmed in a mock documentary style is practically the picture of restraint.”

I must admit, Surf’s Up sounded like the stupidest idea of all time when I first heard of it, but after seeing the trailer, which featured some incredibly pleasing looking waves, cute penguins and Brian Posehn, I was suckered into seeing it (for free and for review, natch.)

I actually quite liked it! One thing I didn’t mention in the review is the cameos from pro surfers Kelly Slater and Rob Machado, playing themselves as penguins. Which is interesting, and has let me to think that these penguins exist in an alternate world where penguins, not humans, evolved and became sentinent, with history following roughly the same chain of events, but in penguin society rather than human. So penguins would remember “Penguin Harbour” when those dastardly Japanese penguins attacked without warning in World War 2, or something.

It’s clear I have thought about this far too much.

It’s been rather a while since I’ve written something for Plan B Magazine, but I’ve returned to its pages in fine style, with a full page interview with Tetsuya Mizuguchi about his interest in creating virtual pop stars for video games; from Ulala (for Space Channel 5) to the nameless girl featured in the Genki Rockets video for Lumines II.

I think it’s a rather interesting concept, and while, admittedly, this isn’t the most enlightening interview (it was his final interview of the Montreal Game Summit, and the jet lag was obviously getting to him) it’s still a good article.

As ever, you can purchase this issue at Plan B’s website.

“Now is Torontoist alone in just not really liking The 40 Year-Old Virgin that much? We understand it took, like, $175 million at the box office and critics seemed to unanimously love it, but, you know, didn’t it feel just a bit…boring, at points? With its rather scatter-brained narrative flow? Did you really think it was that warm and empathetic, or was it ultimately a bit throwaway, a bit empty? We admit it was pretty funny at points, but with all that in mind nothing has sat right with us about the pre-release hype for Knocked Up, the latest film from Judd Apatow, staring 40 Year-Old Virgin co-star (and Vancouverite) Seth Rogen. The film seems to be pushing all the same buttons but this time with what happens after K-I-S-S-I-N-G if you miss out love and then marriage. Therefore we don’t trust any of the critics opinions of it (good or bad) so we’re not going to quote anyone on it. Um, make up your own mind then?”

Yeah, I didn’t like the 40 Year-Old Virgin. I wouldn’t go as far as this guy, but I really thought it was a bad movie that happened to have a lot of good jokes.