Film Friday: “This Column Is Rated…Wait, We Already Used That One” / Torontoist

“ARR! Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End hits this week and as the third second sequel to hit this summer it’s got some stiff competition. Nice to see though that they’ve made sure it beats Spider-Man 3 in at least one respect, in that at 2 hours and 47 minutes long, it’s a good half hour longer. It’s nearly as long as Inland Empire (which is finished at the Royal now, so we promise we won’t mention it again) and apparently, almost as confusing. Reviewers have mostly come to the conclusion that they didn’t have a clue what was going on, but we think NOW’s Deirdre Swain put it most eloquently: ‘It would take the sharpest sword in the armoury to cut through this sailor’s knot of a plot; I couldn’t explain it if I wanted to.’

Much like Shrek, we enjoyed the previous two films hugely (yes, we genuinely enjoyed the sequel) but we hope that, unlike Shrek, we won’t be utterly unimpressed by the third in the series. Please don’t go and see Shrek The Third, readers; it’s incredibly boring, making us laugh only once. You’ll only convince them to make Shrek Goes Forth, which is the title for the fourth film that we [alright, our girlfriend] came up with on the way home.”

If anyone cares, the one bit of Shrek the Third that made us laugh was the final split second of Shrek’s bad dream. The demonic roar of “DADA” is so surprisingly incongruous that I laughed until I felt like I was going to vomit my windpipe. I almost wish I hadn’t consciously made myself stop laughing, as, as I’ve said, there were no other laughs in the film at all.

Published by mathewkumar, on May 25th, 2007. Filed under: Columns, Torontoist2 Comments

2 Responses to “Film Friday: “This Column Is Rated…Wait, We Already Used That One” / Torontoist”

  1. is this “us” like the royal “we”?

    Comment by shapermc on May 26, 2007 at 2:12 am



  2. Yes. It’s the editorial style at Torontoist. Which makes things like my largely personal column read slightly strangely, but what can you do, eh?

    Comment by mathewkumar on May 26, 2007 at 11:46 am



Leave a Reply