52 Gaming Similes To Describe Your Relationship

After reading Boyd’s description of his relationship with his ex-girlfriend as a game of Doom II played on Nightmare mode, are you struggling for that perfect simile to describe your relationship with that certain someone? Well look no further! Our scientific team have come up with 52 perfect descriptions, from lovely to awful, to fit any situation that suits. And so:

Our relationship is like…

1. Killer 7. I don’t understand what you’re saying, and I don’t even know who I am any more.

2. Resident Evil 4. I’m protecting you from all the world’s evils, and you won’t even let me look at your pants.

3. Super Mario Kart. I’m sabotaging the progress of others to reach the rainbow road.

4. Tetris. Shit keeps piling up.

5. Bust A Move. You keep bursting my bubble.

6. Rayman: Raving Rabbids. I’m being put through a series of bizarre trials with little hope of success.

7. Red Steel. I’m just waving my hands in the air and nothing is happening.

8. Harvest Moon. I must always tend our crops to reap a magical harvest.

9. The Sims. Everything keeps breaking down.

10. Shadows of the Colossus. The cost is so great, I’m not sure I even want it any more.

11. Nintendogs. We never really go anywhere, and all I do is clean up your shit.

12. Super Mario Bros. I keep hitting my head against the ceiling and falling down holes.

13. Katamari Damacy. I want to roll you up into my life.

14. The Legend of Zelda. We just keep doing the same things over and over again, just in slightly different ways.

15. Animal Crossing. All my letters and gifts won’t guarantee that you’ll stay.

16. Silent Hill. I’ve never got a clear view of things.

17. Guitar Hero. We have poor timing.

18. Hotel Dusk: Room 215. You never answer a question straight.

19. Sonic The Hedgehog. I’m always running blindly into danger, and I never seem to have any rings for you.

20. Lemmings. I’m trying to save it, but I really just want to hit the nuke button.

21. Dance Dance Revolution. I keep tripping over myself.

22. Chibi Robo. I can never get our house clean.

23. World of Warcraft. I think I’m having fun, but it’s really just a grind.

24. Track and Field. I never seem to rub your buttons fast enough.

25. Gears of War. Even with all my macho posturing, you still don’t take me seriously.

26. Paper Mario. Some people might think it’s flat and lifeless, but they’re not looking at it from the right angle.

27. Kirby’s Dream Land. No matter how hard I suck, I can’t get you all in my mouth.

28. Paperboy. You don’t want what I’m trying to deliver.

29. Wario Ware. Every three seconds, it changes.

30. Wii Sports. It was fun at first, but now my shoulders hurt.

31. Ico. You’re completely helpless, and I’m sick of dragging you around everywhere.

32. Trauma Center: Under the Knife. The operation that would be required to save it is utterly ludicrous.

33. Parappa the Rapper. Perfect rhythm, bright colours.

34. Super Princess Peach. I’m pushing all your emotional buttons, but you’d rather I just left you alone with your vibe-scepter.

35. Grand Theft Auto. I think it’s full of possibility, but you’ll only let me progress if I do it your way.

36. Tie Fighter. I’m having more fun being the bad guy.

37. Punch-Out. I hit you a lot, but you never seem to go down for me.

38. Electroplankton. I’m never going to have anything to show for my time.

39. Mortal Kombat. I used to think you were so cool. Now I have no idea what I was thinking.

40. Ghouls and Ghosts. Punishing.

41. Bomberman. My plans always seem to blow up in my own face.

42. Oregon Trail. It’s dying of dysentery.

43. Street Fighter II. Once you start slapping me, I don’t know what to do to make you stop.

44. Ultima VII. You think I’m a symbol of perfection, but really I’m a sociopathic, thieving bastard.

45. Metal Gear Solid. You just won’t shut up.

46. Pokemon. I’m supposed to be your best friend, and yet you keep throwing me into battles against my will.

47. Final Fantasy. No matter what we go through, we’re fully refreshed after a good night’s sleep.

48. Pro Evolution Soccer. It’s the same thing every time I come back, but it seems to get worse as we go on.

49. Space Invaders. We’ve got a lot of fond memories of it, but we can’t go back.

50. Pac-Man. You keep stuffing your face and trying to avoid old ghosts.

51. Crackdown. I feel like Superman.

52. Duke Nukem Forever. I don’t think it’s ever going to start, is it?

None of these suit? Add your own in the comments!

52 Gaming Similes To Describe Your Relationship was written by Mathew Kumar and Kate Dickson. They’re in a relationship (and we’re not going to tell you which game describes it best.)

[Art by Benjamin Rivers.]

Published by mathewkumar, on April 10th, 2007. Filed under: Workblog • 128 Comments

128 Responses to “52 Gaming Similes To Describe Your Relationship”

  1. man, that was dull.

    Comment by Yar on April 10, 2007 at 12:14 pm



  2. If you type up a good intro I would love to publish this ….

    please?

    Comment by Shapermc on April 10, 2007 at 1:45 pm



  3. Windows Solitare:
    A long term relationship where you know where you stand, although you rarely bother to see it through till the fireworks these days.

    Comment by shaun on April 10, 2007 at 2:02 pm



  4. Brilliant!

    Comment by liquidcross on April 10, 2007 at 3:25 pm



  5. Centipede. Things are going really well. But then you see a spider and all bets are off.

    Comment by Shaun on April 10, 2007 at 3:45 pm



  6. Spy Hunter: There is no end in sight and that song, although initially rad, is starting to really get on my nerves…

    Comment by Scott Pendleton on April 10, 2007 at 5:21 pm



  7. Zelda: Twilight Princess – Things were going swimmingly, then you put on your iron boots.

    Comment by Natalie on April 10, 2007 at 8:03 pm



  8. “No matter how hard I suck, I can’t get you all in my mouth.”

    Wow.

    Comment by Mister Raroo on April 10, 2007 at 10:29 pm



  9. Space Channel 5: It doesn’t matter how much you shake your ass, they’ll still tune you out.

    Comment by Alice on April 11, 2007 at 5:40 am



  10. Dead or Alive 2: The older you are, the bigger the breasts you get on your women.

    Sonic and Knuckles: I’ll put my Knuckles inside anything you clamp onto me.

    Final Fantasy X: Any boy who wears more clothes than you is going to leave you in the end.

    Comment by Alice on April 11, 2007 at 5:51 am



  11. ICO:
    You never do anything, it’s always up to me to take the lead.

    Comment by Liam on April 11, 2007 at 11:13 am



  12. The Legend of Zelda; Twilight Princess After dark the animal in me comes out.

    Comment by Alex Robertshaw on April 11, 2007 at 2:57 pm



  13. Metroid: Wait, you’re a GIRL?

    Warioware: I’m having fun, but I think I’m ADHD now.

    Lumines: Easy enough on paper, but I just can’t figure out what goes where.

    Mega Man: Every time I think I’m invincible, you take it all away from me.

    Oblivion: You’re as good as you look – I spend forever with you, and love every minute of it!

    Mario Party: You still think you’re funny, but I got sick of you a long time ago.

    Comment by DarthCat on April 11, 2007 at 4:55 pm



  14. Contra: This is just to difficult; it would take more than 30 lives(times) to make it happen.

    Comment by XISMZERO on April 11, 2007 at 5:25 pm



  15. Turok: Let’s start over. Again.

    Comment by XISMZERO on April 11, 2007 at 5:28 pm



  16. Superman 64: You’re just a whore.

    /last one. I swear.

    Comment by XISMZERO on April 11, 2007 at 5:31 pm



  17. Starcraft: You build me up only to break me down.

    Shadow of the Colossus: How far would you go to save a life? Ok… too far.

    Zelda 64: Hey, no, YOU LISTEN.

    Pacman: I think you have an eating disorder…

    Starfox: I see where this is going.

    Kirby: Spit and swallow?

    Gears of War: You cut me deep.

    Comment by Arlantis on April 12, 2007 at 1:25 am



  18. Grabbed by the Ghoulies: I’m a raging Pedophile.

    Superman 64: I don’t know why I’m with you, I just know that I want to kill you and bury you where nobody will find you.

    E.T.: Okay, now you’re just fucking with me, right?

    Pac Man Atari: I just want to fucking cut you.

    Comment by rwiggum on April 12, 2007 at 1:27 am



  19. Abe’s OddWorld: Stuff is so important to you – you want more and more and more, but I’m happiest with what I can hold in just one hand. And farting audibly once in a while.

    Quake Wars: Are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you done yet? (Same could be said for Duke Nukem Forever too, I suppose.)

    Comment by jonas on April 12, 2007 at 2:11 am



  20. Duck Hunt: You’re not much to look at and I probably wouldn’t normally bother but DAMN you’re fun when I’m drunk.

    Comment by Allysan on April 12, 2007 at 2:14 am



  21. Final Fantasy VII — Your my second choice.

    Final Fantasy VIII — Your too emo, and I’m not emo enough.

    Final Fantasy IX — Is this even legal?!

    Final Fantasy X — It was all just like a dream…

    Comment by Emeril on April 12, 2007 at 2:18 am



  22. Wii Bowling: I pick you up, finger you, throw you into the gutter, yet you always come back for more…

    Castlevania: Admit it – you’re only here for the flogging…

    Motorstorm: You looked so good a year ago – what happened?

    Comment by laputaquelepario on April 12, 2007 at 2:21 am



  23. Tekken: Your use of animal here is just plain baffling.

    Comment by Shiranui16 on April 12, 2007 at 2:44 am



  24. Enter the Matrix: You want to take it slow, but it really doesn’t make a difference.

    Comment by Shiranui16 on April 12, 2007 at 2:49 am



  25. Halo: Your ring is infected with some kind of horribly contagious fungus thing, and there’s another girl in my head these days.

    Mercenaries: You always want me to do things, but I just want to bring everything crashing down

    Prince of Persia – The Sands of Time: I just want everything to go back to the way it was before.

    Comment by Dalziel_86 on April 12, 2007 at 3:21 am



  26. One last one:

    Age of Empires II: Wood, please? NO!

    Comment by Dalziel_86 on April 12, 2007 at 3:31 am



  27. Galaga – Go ahead and leave me, but I’ll find a way to bring you back and our love will be even stronger than before.

    America’s Army – You’re pretty interesting, but I suspect you’re trying to drag me into something I want nothing to do with.

    Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball – I can’t believe I spent money on you.

    Brain Age – Being together with you makes me feel old.

    Puzzle Quest – You’re so ugly, but so fascinating at the same time.

    Shadow the Hedgehog – I liked you so much better before you started this stupid phase of yours.

    Super Mario Bros. – You’re never there when I come looking for you.

    Ring King – You always seem to know exactly how to make me feel better when I’m feeling low.

    Double Dragon – I would kill my brother for your love.

    Madden – You belong to me and no one else.

    Ancient Art of War at Sea – I will conquer your South Seas as soon as I can board your poopdeck.

    Comment by chef on April 12, 2007 at 4:27 am



  28. Fatal Frame- Every moment has to be picture perfect… or else I’m dead.

    Rule of Rose- If I dont do as you say, Game over.

    —-

    But I enjoyed:
    47. Final Fantasy. No matter what we go through, we’re fully refreshed after a good night’s sleep.

    Comment by Sasha Palacio on April 12, 2007 at 4:52 am



  29. Okami – a great idea, but nobodys buying it

    Comment by CaptainGordon on April 12, 2007 at 5:00 am



  30. Luigi’s Mansion
    It’s taken being stuck in this house together to make me realize – But I’m in love with your brother.

    Robotron 2084
    Whichever way I look, you’re always there for me.

    Virtua Fighter Kids
    I thought children might help, but they’ve only made things worse.

    Project Rub/Feel the Magic: XY/XX
    You told me to tell you “I love you” but I’m not sure if it matters what I say anymore.

    Nintendo DS
    You’ve opened up to me, and let me touch you in places that others wouldn’t. And for that I love you.

    Comment by floppylobster on April 12, 2007 at 5:34 am



  31. …weak

    Comment by killianshane on April 12, 2007 at 6:35 am



  32. Day of the Tentacle: Although I don’t agree with your taste in hentai, you make me laugh enough to make it worthwhile.

    Postal: Listen, I really can’t deal with your shit right now, ok? Ok?? Ok, That’s it… *blam*

    Xbox Live: I know I should care about your inner workings, but I’m just here for the achievements.

    Comment by Seph on April 12, 2007 at 6:45 am



  33. Super Smash Bros: One on one got too boring so I decided to call all our friends.

    Comment by Cyboy on April 12, 2007 at 6:54 am



  34. Oblivion: I want my money back.

    Zelda: I haven’t really liked you since 1993. I’m just sticking around ’cause it’s comfortable.

    Beyond Good and Evil: You’re freakin’ hot, and you’ve only been with three guys?

    Elite Beat Agents: You want me to tap your what with my huh?

    Dead Rising: Can we go home yet? You’ve been trying on clothes for, like, three days.

    Comment by sourcedecay on April 12, 2007 at 7:36 am



  35. Absolutely brilliant – I’m mentioning this on dglenfield.co.uk !

    Comment by Daniel on April 12, 2007 at 7:47 am



  36. Okami: Our love might be beautiful, but i’m always having to paint over the bad stuff.

    Comment by Fnerk on April 12, 2007 at 7:58 am



  37. I love this post…

    Text Twist – You keep twisting my words around.

    Adventure – There’s a lot of words, but not much substance.

    Comment by Arjun on April 12, 2007 at 7:58 am



  38. Castlevania The Adventure – You can’t jump and your whips aren’t helping us either.

    Comment by ginsuboy on April 12, 2007 at 8:09 am



  39. Ninja Gaiden – “Your a bitch but I love you anyway”

    Comment by DS on April 12, 2007 at 8:17 am



  40. Burnout: When we’re playing it hard, you’re allways the one to crash first

    Comment by Gildo on April 12, 2007 at 8:17 am



  41. Final Fantasy XII : Even if i sell a kidney, there’s never enough money to do anything.

    Comment by Cexen on April 12, 2007 at 9:12 am



  42. Shadow Hearts: You love me no matter how many kinds of monsters I turn into.

    Ocarina of Time: And then I play that one song, and it’s like we’re traveling through time.

    Contra: We could keep going forward if you’d stop falling off the screen and hogging the spread fire guns.

    Contra: (again) I can’t do this without a cheat code.

    QBert: Sometimes it seems like jumping off a cliff is the only way out.

    Psychonauts: It feels like I’m Constantly clearing your spiderwebs, searching for the tags for your emotional baggage, and dodging your internal censors… but at least I can get into your head. By the way, who the hell is the milkman!?

    Age of Empires: It’s a struggle until we get enough resources to build a wonder. And some trebuchets.

    Comment by Rabbit on April 12, 2007 at 9:25 am



  43. Zelda: It’s a secret to everybody.

    Comment by Kyune on April 12, 2007 at 9:40 am



  44. Metal Gear Solid: I Have all these toys but I still have to sneak around behind your back.

    Comment by Slu on April 12, 2007 at 9:48 am



  45. Cute. Here’s one for the list.

    Sonic The Hedgehog: I like the rings, but don’t you think we’re rushing into this?

    Still laughing at Arlantis’ Zelda64 “No, you listen!”

    Comment by velu on April 12, 2007 at 10:10 am



  46. Crackdown: I think my Agility won’t increase this way.

    Comment by Loran on April 12, 2007 at 10:15 am



  47. Kingdom Hearts 2: Sometimes tells me I’m heartless, used to think I was just a Nobody.

    Comment by Kyune on April 12, 2007 at 10:22 am



  48. u should become a comedien, but not evryone will understand u…

    Comment by _LiNkiN on April 12, 2007 at 10:23 am



  49. Double Dragon: It’s me and your versus the world, and then when we’ve won, you stab me in the back!

    Comment by Shaun on April 12, 2007 at 11:44 am



  50. Eternal Darkness – No matter what you do, you drive me insane.

    Comment by Adub on April 12, 2007 at 11:58 am



  51. Resident Evil 4: Mierda! this game is awesome cabrón!!

    God of War 2: Big breasts on the beginning??….sweet!

    Guitar Hero 1&2: I look like a very bad mother fucker metal idol!!….with my playschool mini-guitar? O_o

    Comment by Hroseman on April 12, 2007 at 12:07 pm



  52. Pro Evolution Soccer: You look great, you feel great, but every word you speak is just garbled nonsense, the natterings of a mentalist.

    Comment by Rancor on April 12, 2007 at 12:48 pm



  53. Gradius V: C’mon, we were just getting started!

    Lifeforce/Salamander: If I take you somewhere, you’ve got a completely different story.

    R-Type: Full of bad sex jokes.

    Raiden: You’re loud, angry, leave debris EVERYWHERE, and always resort to backing me into a corner and shooting me down.

    Radiant Silvergun: When the end of the world comes, you’ll still probably make me look for your damned dogs.

    Ikaruga: Dealing with you means I have to constantly switch sides. After a while, it becomes an art, I guess.

    Darius: Fishy is still the best way to put it.

    Comment by crybringer on April 12, 2007 at 12:52 pm



  54. Metal Gear Solid 2: Not the girl I fell in love with.

    Comment by Kyune on April 12, 2007 at 12:56 pm



  55. Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney: You always object to everything.

    Comment by Okage on April 12, 2007 at 2:09 pm



  56. Luigi’s Mansion. No matter how much I vacume the house, the backdoor always stays shut.

    Yoshi’s Touch ‘n Go. Whenever I want to lick and touch you, you have to go.

    Killer 7. You never let me stray from your path and your head explodes when I hit you in certain places.

    Comment by Protector one on April 12, 2007 at 2:13 pm



  57. Alone in the Dark: …’Nuff said, really.

    Comment by Edward on April 12, 2007 at 2:56 pm



  58. Double Dragon It take’s two to tango

    FFVII DOC You are preety but, I rather shoot myself

    Comment by Marlon on April 12, 2007 at 3:47 pm



  59. Bubsy the cat Get out of my life!

    Comment by Marlon on April 12, 2007 at 3:51 pm



  60. Our relationship is like:

    Super Smash Bros. Melee – It’s always cute when we fight, but the way you taunt me when you knock me off just makes me want to come back.

    Virtua Fighter – Everyone tells me it’s very deep and meaningful, but I’ve never figured out how to land the first blow.

    Civilization – You’re always recommending that I research “writing.” And sometimes “horseback riding.”

    Comment by dreamshade on April 12, 2007 at 3:53 pm



  61. Our relationship is like:

    Starfox – Sometimes I shoot you down because you accidentally flew in my way, and sometimes I shoot you down with deliberate anger.

    Phoenix Wright – Nothing makes you happier than when you get the chance to catch me lying.

    Comment by dreamshade on April 12, 2007 at 4:03 pm



  62. TMNT: You’re a sad mockery of everything I wanted when I was young, but you’re really easy so it pays off.

    Halo 2: I hate the people I have to hang around with when I want to spend time with you in public.

    Chronicles of Riddick Escape From Butcher Bay: I miss you.

    Geometry Wars: You must enjoy making me look like a fool.

    Mortal Kombat Armageddon: I used to lay awake at night dreaming about you, but now you’re just a whore. I think all the men in your past are just too much for you to handle.

    Fable: I just don’t feel like putting in the extra effort to my this work.

    Shenmue: Anyone who can’t love you just doesn’t know what they’re missing.

    Ultima Online 2: The one that got away.

    Comment by Shinobi Sean on April 12, 2007 at 4:17 pm



  63. “Duck Hunt: You’re not much to look at and I probably wouldn’t normally bother but DAMN you’re fun when I’m drunk.”
    Allysan’s comment!

    LOLOLOL!!!

    Very funny :)

    >.

    Comment by Oliver on April 12, 2007 at 4:44 pm



  64. The Godfather Blackhand edition:
    I’ve met others like you, but none of them were so hands-on.

    Donkey Kong Country:
    Every time you come back I become less interested in you.

    Goldeneye:
    I’ve got great guns, but you keep running away from me.

    Comment by George on April 12, 2007 at 8:32 pm



  65. Final Fantasy X-2: I was excited at first, but you were just so disappointing.

    Space Channel 5: I pushed the button, dammit, so stop telling me I didn’t.

    Wii Boxing: I keep hitting you, but you won’t go down.

    Goldeneye: Back in the day, my buddies would get together and we’d all go at once.

    Halo 2: I’d skip school to be with you.

    World of Warcraft: You’re draining me of my life energy.

    World of Warcraft (again): You ruined my healthier relationships.

    Comment by The combined effort of 2 Katies on April 12, 2007 at 9:11 pm



  66. Our relationship is like the original NES: To get you to play I have to blow you first.

    Comment by JonnyB on April 12, 2007 at 9:52 pm



  67. Warcraft III – I’ve had it with you coming from behind.

    Comment by 5parrowhawk on April 12, 2007 at 10:19 pm



  68. Minesweeper: Follow the signs correctly and you’ll get the happy face

    Comment by Oscar on April 13, 2007 at 12:20 am



  69. Daikatana: All that build-up and now that we’ve met I can’t even stand to be around you.

    The Legend of Zelda – Wind Waker: I thought you were gonna be a little… y’know… older, cause I’m not sure I feel comfortable about this anymore.

    The Legend of Zelda – Link’s Adventure: Your sister is way hotter.

    Half-Life: I feel like something is prying us apart.

    Rising Zan: You’re freaky-fun, but damn you’re ugly.

    STALKER: I held out so long for you, but it was worth it.

    Star Wars Galaxies: We got off to a great start and then you just completely changed on me. What happened? I liked the old you.

    Comment by DannyBoy on April 13, 2007 at 12:21 am



  70. Wii Play: Sadly, our second date was only remotely as good as our first.

    Comment by JimJoop on April 13, 2007 at 3:23 am



  71. Our relationship is like Sneak King: Dude, you’re give me the creeps.

    (This next one was mentioned by Fizzyboy on the MegaTokyo forums:)

    Our relationship is like Half-Life: I just can’t handle the crabs…

    :D

    Comment by JonnyB on April 13, 2007 at 1:25 pm



  72. Outrun: Shallow but so much fun!

    Comment by The_B on April 13, 2007 at 7:22 pm



  73. Zelda: Time and again I save the world for you… and in the end I still get nothing.

    Comment by Owyn Bladewing on April 13, 2007 at 11:10 pm



  74. Ico: That… HURTS!

    Comment by Owyn Bladewing on April 13, 2007 at 11:12 pm



  75. Unreal Tournament: I’ll believe in your Redeemer when I see that rapturous flash.

    Aquaman: You are no fun… and your hair is weird too.

    Comment by MC on April 14, 2007 at 3:24 am



  76. Tetris: Every time I find my missing piece, it just disappears in a flash and I have to start all over until I’m smothered by the possibilities.

    Comment by Juhkust on April 14, 2007 at 3:59 pm



  77. Luigis Mansion: It’s a suck and blow relationship.

    Comment by Ike Anyanetu on April 15, 2007 at 1:19 am



  78. Donpachi: Why don’t you try hard?

    Comment by Acid King on April 15, 2007 at 6:17 am



  79. Pac-man. your drug use is turning me blue in the face

    Comment by shasha on April 15, 2007 at 4:41 pm



  80. Max Payne: I just need you to give me more pain so I can go on.

    Comment by N30 on April 15, 2007 at 5:49 pm



  81. Sinistar: You always spend way too much time getting ready, you just HAVE to make a big entrance and every night ends up with you insulting me the whole time.

    Soldier Blade: Sometimes I want to take you at full, and sometimes I just wanna have my way for 2 or 5 minutes.

    Smash TV: You know I’m only here for the big prizes.

    Ikari Warriors: Bros before ho’s.

    Metal Slug: You’re hard as hell to deal with, but goddamn… I could put you in a cardboard box and you’d make it look good!

    Tempest: We keep going around in circles.

    Gyruss: You like to travel far, but it’s always on your schedule. At least you have classy taste in music.

    Asteroids: Stoned.

    Comment by crybringer on April 16, 2007 at 1:24 am



  82. Ikaruga: Everything always has to be black and white!

    Comment by Dustin on April 16, 2007 at 1:39 am



  83. Castlevania IV, everytime it starts to get fun, you rudely interupt me and need to sleep.

    Comment by cetra on April 16, 2007 at 4:44 am



  84. The Sims2; Sure, it all looked brilliant at first, but you keep stalling on me, and you emotionally blackmail me into buying you new stuff all the time, and if I don’t, you refuse to do anything interesting.

    Golden Eye; At first you made me feel like Grace Jones, but now you just keep shooting me down for no good reason; I thought we were on the same team.

    Online Scrabble; a poor imitation of something better: I can never find the right words, and it’s all too easy to cheat.

    Zwinky: I made you bitch, now you just show up and bug me. I don’t even find you cute anymore.

    Granny’s Garden; immortalised and sacred in my memory, you are so perfect that sometimes I doubt that you ever really existed. I fear that if I ever saw you again it would shatter my fragile illusion of your brilliance; (I was more easily impressed back then.)

    Comment by (hello)katie on April 16, 2007 at 11:33 am



  85. heres one for ya

    Burn Out: i become a millionair for killing ppl in there cars… i feel good inside.

    Comment by jay on April 16, 2007 at 1:38 pm



  86. Capcom vs. SNK: I really like going out with you, but when we do all your friends looks so nice, do you really have to wear the same thing you had on 10 years ago?

    Comment by NotPayingAttention on April 16, 2007 at 1:41 pm



  87. Our relationship is like…

    Haunting Ground: You’re always running away from me.

    Comment by Neko on April 16, 2007 at 9:06 pm



  88. Kingdom Hearts: Your just a little kid pretending to be a grown-up. But it’s cool, that’s the turn on.

    -or-

    Your a grown-up that thinks she’s a kid. GROW UP!

    Comment by Josh on April 17, 2007 at 3:57 am



  89. Soul Calibur: We draw swords to each other’s throats day in and day out.

    Virtua Fighter: You look good now, but I remember what you looked like when we met.

    Marval Vs Capcom 2: It’s broken, but it’s still a lot of fun.

    Comment by Kanvis on April 20, 2007 at 2:43 am



  90. Harvest Moon 64:
    If all it takes is a cute puppy for you to love me then consider it a done deal.

    Grolanser Generations:
    You can have my Gem if I can have yours.

    Final Fantasy 8:
    I appear as though I dislike you but really I’m here waiting for you to make the first move.

    Comment by Shannon on April 22, 2007 at 1:56 am



  91. Donkey Kong – Every time I think I’m through with you, you try to start all over.

    Castlevania II – Why do you want me to get a silk bag? You and I both know you’ll never use it.

    Sonic the Hedgehog – Who the hell are all these friends of yours?

    Tales of Symphonia – You try to be all preachy and tell me how my religion’s a complete hoax, but it’s okay because you’re pretty.

    Dragon Spirit: The New Legend – Before I met you, I had no idea how wonderful the color pink was.

    Paper Mario – Sometimes I wonder if you’re too forgiving, or if you accidentally thought I was mentally retarded.

    Shaq Fu – Just because you’re kind of famous, it doesn’t mean you’re attractive… at all.

    Comment by Athesalis on May 20, 2007 at 11:34 pm



  92. Chrono Trigger – We can go back and fix all those mistakes, right?

    City of Heroes – You’re my Inspiration!

    Maplestory – You’re cute and all, but I got bored after two weeks.

    Morrowind – A newcomer tempted me once, but could not ever take your place, my darling!

    Dungeons and Dragons – Things are much more interesting with four other people involved.

    Comment by Plangkye on July 8, 2007 at 2:29 am



  93. Elite Beat Agents: You could just help me but you prefer to dance around the situation.

    Comment by Logan on July 8, 2007 at 6:11 pm



  94. Black and White: You say I am a god yet you put so many limitations on me.

    Comment by maninblack on July 13, 2007 at 7:12 pm



  95. Warcraft III – I’ve had it with you coming from behind.

    Comment by Śmieszne filmy on September 8, 2007 at 7:17 am



  96. Fallout: You… You never change…

    Comment by Vgk on September 11, 2007 at 4:14 pm



  97. Fifa 2007 – Looks aren’t everything

    Animal Crossing – I have to tend to the weeds everyday…..really?

    Roller Coaster Tycoon – I always run out of money

    Comment by medals on September 12, 2007 at 6:49 pm



  98. Castlevania: Symphony of the Night-Just when I think I’ve got you all figured out, you pull a 180 and it’s back to square one.

    Comment by Metal1 on September 13, 2007 at 6:02 pm



  99. I’m glad to see that Ultima VII made the list!

    Comment by Andrew on September 14, 2007 at 4:01 pm



  100. Galactic Civilizations: As soon as I think you’re mine, someone else shows up and prevents the invasion.

    Comment by Dave on September 15, 2007 at 6:43 pm



  101. Most of these are great btw but I feel the need for moar
    lets add some xbox360::
    Viva Pinata: OK, you’re just fucking annoying

    Bioshock: I’d like to tell you that we can have a different future than predicted but it always ends up the same (and u kill little girls :p).

    Overlord: You’re great and you do everything I say

    Lost Planet: You look nice but you’re just stupid unless you are with others

    eh…

    Comment by Slimmy on September 19, 2007 at 11:11 pm



  102. Sim City – no mather how many times we build it, it will always end up destroyed

    Resident Evil: Stop biting me please!!

    Metal Gear – Stop calling me whe i’m busy, you don’t help at all

    Smash Brothers – Everything was fine until you started throwing stuff at me

    Comment by rx:ko on September 26, 2007 at 2:24 am



  103. dawn of the dead: the more i beat you the messier it gets XD

    Comment by heather on November 12, 2007 at 11:10 am



  104. lol sorry dead rising!

    Comment by heather on November 12, 2007 at 11:10 am



  105. dead rising again: no matter how hard i hit you, you never learn!

    Comment by heather on November 12, 2007 at 11:12 am



  106. Crysis – You’re so pretty, but too high maintenance for me. Let’s try again in a year or two.

    Comment by lolo on March 5, 2008 at 1:46 am



  107. beatmania IIDX:
    There are too many scales to climb to get it Just Perfect!… can’t we just go at it like Normal?

    (I know, the Japanese best note rating is a flashing Great!, which is called Just Great!; in the beatmania US version, that rating is called Perfect! instead. I’m sure anyone who’s played the games can tell what I meant by the “scales” xD)

    Comment by dj DTHTRP on August 31, 2008 at 2:37 pm



  108. Awesome Ultima VII reference!!! I don’t see enough of those.

    Comment by Skwerl on December 17, 2008 at 6:49 pm



  109. Big Rigs off road racing – YOURE WINNER!

    Comment by ddsd on December 19, 2008 at 9:17 pm



  110. Bubsy 3D – you look horrible and handle worse

    Superman 64: I only like you because you suck

    Kingdom Hearts: when will we be together?

    Goof Troop: you’re only fun when i have a friend over.

    Pong: you’re a Cougar

    Katamari Damacy: I’m stuck on you

    Street Fighter: i can’t understand you

    Comment by TateXD on December 23, 2008 at 2:03 am



  111. Half-Life: I just try to avoid unforeseen consequences.

    Comment by chaddo on December 26, 2008 at 3:07 am



  112. Awesome quotes made something with the ones i liked, and sneaked in some mine:

    As time passes I see it turn out like Fallout 3
    Although I wish it was more like Oblivion
    You will never be my Final Fantasy VII
    And it’s always like FF1

    After it I always want some Prince of Persia
    And now you just are Metal Gear Solid 2
    At first you where my Halo 2
    But you’ll always be my Nintendo DS

    _____
    Fallout 3: At night Ghouls (and crazy things) come out.

    Comment by Guest200990 on December 26, 2008 at 4:43 am



  113. Doom 3 – Everything’s pitch black.

    Comment by Chaz on December 29, 2008 at 2:16 am



  114. Left 4 Dead: No matter how long I leave you hanging off the ledge, you just won’t fucking let go.

    Team Fortress 2: No matter how much I change, I’m just not good enough.

    Comment by Chris on January 2, 2009 at 2:07 pm



  115. Our relationship is like…
    WoW: I’m tired of you doing it from behind!

    Comment by Jay on March 28, 2009 at 4:25 am



  116. The Crysis one FTW

    Comment by Peter on April 28, 2009 at 10:03 am



  117. Grim Fandango: Sooner or later we all push up flowers.

    Comment by Kheetor on May 9, 2009 at 7:35 am



  118. Suikoden: You might think I’m OCD, but I love it when it’s just you.. me.. and 106 of our friends. Even the dead ones.

    Comment by Nate on May 10, 2009 at 7:42 pm



  119. This is stupid

    Comment by james on May 11, 2009 at 1:56 am



  120. Stepmania/DDR – Half the time i can’t keep up with you.

    Comment by Seraphin on May 15, 2009 at 10:34 pm



  121. S.O.C.O.M. Navy Seals (online) – It was the best thing ever before all the cheating happened.

    Comment by Client X on June 21, 2009 at 11:33 pm



  122. Milon’s Secret Castle – You are impossible for me to figure out and not worth the effort it would take for me to cheat. Burn in hell, sadistic creation of Satan.

    Golden Tee – you are about as fun as watching old people hump.

    Killer Instinct – it kills me when you show your boobs.

    Tomb Raider – I only spend money on you because I love staring at your butt.

    Spy Hunter – Everybody is trying to murder and sabotage me, but at least the soundtrack is cool.

    Bubble Bobble – You’re a scaly little monster who eats nothing but junk food, plus your breath is fatal.

    Monopoly – You own everything and I’m in jail.

    Grand Theft Auto San Andreas – I’d rather drive around shooting, stealing and avoiding cops than hang out with you or any of my other girlfriends.
    I wear that gimp suit in public.

    Toejam & Earl – I have a third leg and you’re a big fat alien.

    Final Fantasy XII – I am a stupid, fruity looking little thief who has surrounded himself with hot chicks who ignore me. If I only had a pimpin’ ride like that Balthier guy has…

    Final Fantasy XII – Ever since we got together, I’ve been gathering weapons. The weapons are getting more dangerous.

    Final Fantasy XII – You’re a Playboy bunny and the hottest chick around but I’m pretty sure you’re a lesbian. Somehow that makes me want you more.

    Final Fantasy XII – Shut up, princess. I’d quit using you if you ever stopped wearing that skirt.

    Final Fantasy XII – You look like a homosexual pirate, your accent is fake (Britain doesn’t even EXIST in this realm) and I only hang out with you because you have a nice vehicle. Shut up and fly me to the market, you unfathomable tool.

    Virtual Boy – You always have a headache, you are aesthetically disgusting and the fact that you exist makes me ashamed. If I tried to sell you, I would fail. Hard.

    Comment by Client X on June 22, 2009 at 12:53 am



  123. “Alone in the Dark: …’Nuff said, really.

    Comment by Edward — April 12, 2007 @ 2:56 pm”

    That’s classic, dude.

    Comment by Client X on June 22, 2009 at 1:15 am



  124. Starcraft 64: When you sleep, try not to barrelroll like last night.

    Comment by KingRaph on February 25, 2010 at 4:25 am



  125. Silent Hill 3 – “What do you mean, you don’t want kids?”

    Comment by Jinx on March 4, 2010 at 7:35 pm



  126. ha!!!!!

    Comment by Pearl on March 15, 2010 at 4:57 pm



  127. Bioshock 2- no matter how hard I keep trying, your little sister just wants to ride on my back.

    Comment by penny on August 20, 2011 at 1:03 pm



  128. Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time- You nag at me to listen to you but then you don’t help me like all the other faeries would.

    Dead Space: No matter how much I try, I can never get away from you.

    Comment by Baby Blion on February 3, 2012 at 10:35 pm



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