Film Friday: “Billy Zane Was in a Film Called Invincible, You Know.” / Torontoist

Every week I’m going to round up the posts I’ve done across the week for Torontoist that I think are worth remembering. As in an average week this is only going to be my Film Friday, I’m just going title the posts on this workblog this way. Even though this week was more exciting than most, with the Toronto International Film Festival holding its final press conference in Nathan Phillips Square on Tuesday.

Nathan Phillips Square is the concrete park in front of Toronto’s architecturally interesting city hall building. Apparently it’s instrumental to the climax of Resident Evil: Apocalypse, but I haven’t seen it. Someone also once told me that the old mayor had a cardboard cut out of himself that used to sit in his office chair when he was out, but I have no idea if that’s true either. The square is usually of most interest for the wide range of crazy people that hang out there, and some nice junk food stands (people say it’s the best poutine in the city). My long time personal favorite of the crazies, the guy who stood at the edge of the square with a gang of rats and a couple of ferrets that’d charge you to have your picture taken with him has sadly been absent this summer. I hope he’s okay!

Tuesday:
Toronto International Film Festival 2006: The Only Thing Anyone Cares About
“Brad Pitt is coming.”

Toronto International Film Festival 2006: Everything Announced
Full coverage of the press conference. Written speedily, but (I hope) amusingly and informatively.

The interesting thing about writing coverage or summaries for a film festival where they announce hundreds of films is how transparently your personal interests are shown. Here it’s blatantly obvious I don’t really rate the Gala films, but I practically wet myself over the Bollywood discussion and Zidane: Un Portrait Du XXIéme Siécle.

Friday:
Film Friday: Billy Zane Was in a Film Called Invincible, You Know.
“If we follow the ‘Snakes on a Plane’ style of naming, this [Invincible] would be called “Mark Wahlberg is an Unlikely Hero in the Seventies” – which would be the third in a series, then (following Boogie Nights and Rockstar.)”

I have to admit, this joke was basically stolen from my girlfriend, but it’s not like we weren’t all thinking it, am I right?

The secret of any writer’s jokes, I bet, is they’re all ripped off of things they’ve said or heard in the pub. Where else could inspiration come from?

August 25th, 2006 : Columns, Torontoist